When my fiancé, uche suggested that I enrol for the forever friends class, I wasn’t so excited, not because I didn’t think that the
class would enrich me spiritually but my spirit was dampened by the over 1 hour journey I will be making every
Tuesday to attend the class in Wembley, at the London Light House parish of the House on the Rock. If you live in London you will understand that the A406 on any given rush hour evening is every
driver’s nightmare, but having previously completed the same course in her parish (The Refuge, HOTR Abuja), I had
no other option but to accept to enrol, at least to please her (so I thought). I have since found out that I am
also pleasing myself and couldn’t have forgiven myself if I hadn’t enrolled for the classes.
Forever Friends is a 12 weeks
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Pastor O
of "Forever Friends"
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marriage class which holds every Tuesday from 7-9 pm, a new topic is dissected every week in an interactive session
led by the youthful and anointed Pastor Omawumi Michael Efueye
(popularly known as Pastor O) and his wife, the graceful Pastor Carol Efueye, both being 20+ years marriage veterans.
There is a ‘we are in it together’ kind
of feeling amongst the over 50 participants, comprising both married couples, and those like yours truly who are
aspirants. This is good because people feel a psychological safety and so are able to let their guards down and
share their true life experiences. The pastor always endeavours to apply Biblical principles to most issues and
questions arising. You may liken the class to a marriage counselling session with a marriage counsellor but without
the shrink, what you get at the session is an inspired man of God, very passionate about the divine purpose of
marriage guiding, teaching, chastising and powering you on to succeed.
The many challenges of living in a secular
world has meant that people are
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beginning to take many things for granted, including God’s word and principles, marriages are suffering as a result
as the divorce rates continue to increase. But this shouldn’t be the portion of a true believer, says Pastor O.
According to him, ‘knowledge equips the Christian to make better decisions and choices about marriage and this
knowledge comes from seeking the word of God’.
In one of the sessions, Pastor O made
an eye-opening revelation and challenged the long held belief and notion that a man’s wife is his helpmate, this
according to him does not conform to God’s principles, rather a man’s wife is his ‘helpmeet’, he traced the genesis
of the word ‘meet’ to a Hebrew word which means ‘as like yourself’. In conclusion he said that the man is a reflection
of God, as God created man in his own image, the woman therefore is a reflection of man, as she was created from
man. Therefore men should always treasure, encourage and appreciate their wives as wives become the mirrors that
others will use to judge the husbands.
Pastor O also challenged
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Uche Nworah
and other participants at a "Forever Friends" Session
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men to love their wives, something which doesn’t come naturally to them and away from their ‘comfort zone’. He
calls to mind the divine instructions on men to love their wives, saying that this love should be unconditional
just like the sacrificial death of Jesus Christ which he suffered because of his love for the church. According
to him, men should first love their wives unconditionally even without the wives obeying the divine instructions
to ‘honour and respect their husbands’.
During another session, Pastor O jolted
almost all the participants when he condemned the practices by born-again Christians during their marriage ceremonies
to indulge in traditional practices such as the pouring of libations and the breaking of kola-nuts, according to
him ‘such practices are demonic and do not conform to God’s principles’. This came as a surprise to many in the
audience especially the Igbo, whose culture are deeply rooted in such practices. In the ensuing Q & A session,
the pastor’s wife, Sister Carol advised the participants to thread with caution on the issue in order not to alienate
their families, especially for couples whose wedding ceremonies are already imminent. ‘This calls for tact and
understanding’ she said.
It is quite obvious that the many sessions
we have attended have greatly enriched
our lives; but just like Pastor O says, we should not be just ‘hearers’ of the word; we should also be ‘doers’
of the word.
Some of the participants have lots of
praise for Pastor O and his wife, Sister Carol and believe that the pair has sown good seeds in all our lives,
we are all eagerly awaiting the release of the complete session tapes and DVD, a must-have I will say for every
couple, married or intending.
Hear some of the participants in their
own words:
The forever friends class has really resolved
issues and conflicts in my relationship. It has made me more aware of my role and responsibilities, as well as
those of my partner. God leads our lives and I feel more blessed that I have my partner in my life. Ike Okonta.
The class has helped me to crystallize
God’s purpose for marriage, the role of both partners in marriage and the importance of seeking God’s face before
getting married. Anonymous.
The class has brought an
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Participants
at a "Forever Friends" Session
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awareness of things that we would not normally discuss, it has helped our conversation and we now see stuffs from
God’s point of view. The class has been a blessing. Christiana Ellah
It has really opened our eyes to our relationship,
we talk about our relationship a lot more and this is helping us to grow, heal and come a lot closer together,
to realise the type of marriage that God wants for us. We will encourage all couples who intend to get married
to attend such a class, it is very life changing. Chinedu Iheagwam & Chinelo Okezie.
The forever friends class has matured
us greatly and confirmed many of the things God already speaks to us about. Richard & Queen.
I have learned so much in the forever
friends classes, I find it even more essential as a single person and it helps in the way I relate to other people
and my family. I feel that with each class, I grow spiritually as a better Christian woman. Bebe Okezie.
The class has better positioned me for
my responsibility and role as a husband, which is
to love my wife first, and unconditionally. I now know my duties towards her, and have learnt other essentials
in marriage such as openness, tolerance and communication. I now also appreciate the fact that we are different
and to always bear that in mind. Anonymous.
We have been able to recognise our differences
as man and woman. We now know why we both act the way we do, being that, according to Pastor O, men and women are
wired differently. I have come to understand that if I love my partner unconditionally, just like Christ loves
the church, then I can be rest assured that she will be submissive and will also love me equally unconditionally.
Aaron Tochukwu.
Attending the classes has taught me a
lot about marriage and myself, I can now re-address issues that concern me with the help of the Holy Spirit so
as to have a successful marriage life. Anonymous.
As a single person, my views and opinions
on marital issues have changed drastically, I can categorically say that my marriage would have become a statistic
if I had gotten married years ago. Dave Omouyo.